Teenagers Today's Health Advisory Panel Answers: Am I being unreasonable to expect my daughter to act responsibly and make good grades before allowing her to drive?

By Chris Crutcher Author Licensed Child and Family Therapist

Question:

My 15-year-old daughter is failing three courses in school. Her other grades are A's and B's. I have asked her to get help from teachers after school and said that I will pay for tutoring. In our state, she would have been about to get her driver's permit when she turned 15. I let her know far in advance that if her grades were not at least a C average she would not be able to get her permit. She will turn 16 in June and wants to drive. She is not making an effort to improve her grades and tells me that grades have nothing to do with driving. Basically, she is a good Christian girl – although very lazy – and doesn't want to do her share of the chores. Am I being unreasonable to expect her to act responsibly and make good grades before allowing her to drive?

Answer:

No, that's a natural consequence. Most states give a generous discount on insurance for teens who get good grades. At any rate, it's a good carrot to put out there. You don't have to get emotionally involved – just say what has to happen and make sure she gets her reward (the permit) when she does what she needs to do to get the grades up.